Losing 50 kilos

I wasn’t always overweight. Bit plump, maybe, but not really fat. I come from a small city without working public transport, so I had to cycle everywhere, for years. Even under this layer of fat, my legs are in pretty strong condition still. I could eat what I wanted, since I got so much physical exercise every day. When I turned 18, my BMI was around 27, so I was about ~5 kg away from normal weight.

When I moved away from home to my first apartment, I got depressed. I went to a doctor and he prescribed me the medicine, Remeron. I didn’t feel that it was helping at all - I felt tired all the time. And hungry, so I ate. And ate, and ate. I was especially keen on ice cream, those 2 litre boxes you can eat straight from. I remember that on worst days, I could eat four boxes. That’s 8 litres of ice cream per day. And that totals to over 6000 kcals per day - from ice cream alone.

I started gaining weight, but didn’t really realize it first. I started getting stretch marks and my clothes didn’t fit, but even then it didn’t really dawn on to me, because I was so messed up from the medicine. When a doctor finally noticed the weight gain and stopped the medicine, it was already too late.

In just 6 months, I had ballooned up to 107 kilos. That’s about 30 kg more. 5 kilos per month. I had stretch marks all over, and suddenly my 46/48 dress size had changed to 50/52. I was just a wobbling pile of flesh.

I managed to keep the weight on 107 kgs (+- 5 kg) the next 7 years. I tried dieting couple of times, usually losing about 10 kgs in two months but when I got tired of counting and filling the food diary, they all came back. When an unhappy relationship derailed me again, I started piling on weight again. When I started this final weight loss on July 1st, 2010, I weighted 120 kilos. Not a gram less or more.

Today (Aug 12th) I weight 114,8 kg - so far I’ve lost 5.2 kilos and still going down. I’m not in a hurry - this is the last time I will lose weight in my life.

And this time I will succeed.